Zelensky Offers to Broker Peace Between Musk and Trump

KYIV (The Borowitz Report) 7 June 25
—In a bold attempt at high-stakes diplomacy, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy offered on Friday to broker a peace deal between Elon Musk and Donald J. Trump.
“It is time for the fighting to stop,” Zelenskyy said to Musk and Trump. “And I am willing to make the ultimate sacrifice: sitting in the same room as the two of you.”
Addressing Trump, the Ukrainian declared, “Mr. President, Elon gave you 250 million dollars, and you haven’t said ‘thank you’ once.”
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